Tuesday, September 27, 2011

My Favorite Child

Have you seen or heard any of the chit chat on TV or in blogs about the new study saying that parents often favor one child over the others? I've heard over and over that many parents don't love their children equally. Well, such talk provokes me to divulge my favorite child.

I birthed and raised 3 children, 1 girl (the oldest) and 2 boys. Did I love them equally? I'm not sure how to answer that question. Is love a static emotion? Is the love I feel for my husband, children, siblings and friends the same, equal emotion? I think not. Since my children were and are not the same, how can I love them the same? But do I have a deep, firm love for all of them? YES. I love each one for their individuality. I celebrate their unique strengths - and they have many! Would I give one away? Well, there have been moments, particularly as teens, but I wouldn't want to eliminate one of them from my life.

How do you quantify love? Remember the childhood gambit of flinging your arms wide and saying, "I love you this much!" Well, that's how much I love my kids. But I'm not sure that is equal or the same. J, my oldest, I love your smile, your physical carriage, your strive for perfection, your sense of fun, your honesty. J, first son, I love your sensitivity, your warmth, your caring, your inquiring mind. T, my youngest, I love your serene core, your talent, your thoughtful and thought provoking advice, your sense of the silly. I could go on and on, but you get the gist. I love them differently but equally. That's not the same but it's the best that I can do.

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